Father’s Day - Can a Child get Divorced?

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Shrimati Maneka Gandhi,

Hon’ble Minister of Women and Child Development,

New Delhi, India.

SUBJECT: To remind the Importance of Fathers in life of a Child on this Father’s Day

Today, on the eve of the Father’s Day, 15th June 2014, Save Family Foundation submits to the Hon’ble Minister some major issue with the society which have been kept under carpets or ignored irrespective of this Ministry being dedicated to take care of Child Rights too.

The Movement is also dedicated to the cause of Child Rights and Shared Parenting across the country. Our NGOs is run by people who recognize the serious effects of Parental Alienation of children due to increasing single parent families on account of divorce/separation. We are committed to eliminate such cruel alienation of children from their parent(s) due to ever increasing divorce/separation rates. We are a pro-family and pro-life organization; our aims, objectives and goals are based on research findings & our mission is to promote family harmony in the society. We are a large group of people from all walks of life, like Software engineers, Doctors, Teachers, Businessmen, & Social workers etc., to address & create awareness on this burning issue in our country on behalf of the children to protect their rights to be connected to both Biological parents.

Father’s Day is observed every year on the third Sunday of June worldwide to honour the contribution of “Fathers” as an expression of love and tribute. It is needless to say the present day fathers are more actively involved in parenting their kids in the physical, mental & emotional welfare & upbringing of their child. Unfortunately, Divorce rates are going up substantially year on year (currently over 30% & increasing), especially in educated and urban class people. There are Lakhs of cases in the Family courts. We are concerned with the growing custody battles between the parents and the ill effects on the children due to their parent’s separation. Children deserve the love and affection of both biological parents (father & mother) irrespective of their parent’s matrimonial status at any point of time.

When, in 2005, Save Indian Family Movement was founded, Children & Men were already ignored and the Law Makers, under the pressure from heavily funded Feminist groups were coming up with Legislations which in name of Women Empowerment were creating “assassin’s weapon” to penalize Children & Men to bring in more and more hatred against fathers in the society. Since then, Save Indian Family (SIF) Movement has helped over 10 Lakh families across the globe who have been suffering at the hands of various Biased Laws of India. Through it’s various allied NGOs, including (SFF) Save Family Foundation, Delhi (Regd. NGO), CRISP – Children’s Rights Initiative for Shared Parenting, Bangalore (Regd. NGO), SIF has been tirelessly working towards bringing peace and harmony to lives of Fathers and their family members dues to various dangerous litigation instituted via these “Easy to Misuse” Biased Laws.

The Problems faced by Fathers:

1.      The society views the separated/divorced father as an ATM MACHINE. Thousands of fathers are not allowed to see their own children let alone spending quality time with them. The child becomes a bargaining tool by greedy wives to extort money and property.

2.      Many husbands face threats of false cases like dowry harassment, domestic violence, kidnapping, child molestation, etc if they make attempts to meet their children against the wish of their wives.

3.      We have also come across many cases wherein women just wait to get a child out of wedlock and as soon as the child is born, they start abusing the husband and do not allow him to spend time with his own child using them as a mere sperm donor.

4.      When a couple goes through separation, the child is used for playing emotional games on the father so as to control him. Many women poison the child against the father out of vengeance. It hampers the father-child bonding which is essential for normal growth of the child.

5.      The family courts are generally biased against fathers. First of all, visitation orders are not passed generously and even if passed, there is no practical mechanism available to enforce the same or punish the woman violating such orders. While it is imperative that family courts grant open access to fathers facilitating them to see their children, such orders are a rarity instead of being a norm.

Fatherless society is dangerous:

As we know fathers play a vital role in the development of a child. In the United States of America, reported statistics tells that Children from fatherless homes are:

1.      5 times more likely to commit suicide

2.      32 times more likely to run away from home.

3.      20 times more likely to have behavioural disorders

4.      9 times more likely to drop out of high school.

5.      10 times more likely to abuse chemical substances (become drug addicts)

6.      20 times more likely to end up in prison.

We have following demands:

1.      Grant immediate and equal (child) access to both the separated parents, to legislate laws and make co-parenting mandatory.

2.      Need of separate Union Ministry for Children and to de-link the same from the present Women agendas, since their objectives & goals are different and child rights are totally being ignored.

3.      Government must immediately Roll back the “Marriage Law Amendment Bill” which is pending to be cleared by the Lok Sabha & as it is gender biased and must be replaced by a Family welfare bill making Men and children also as beneficiaries as per the principal of Natural justice.

4.      Punish people who misuse laws meant for protection of genuine women victims by filing false cases, particularly in IPC 498A, Dowry Prohibition Act, Domestic Violence Act and also filing false rape charges on father with an ulterior motive and concocted to deprive the children from accessing their own natural father

5.      Ban Child interviews when the children are of tender age & in a hostile environment as it is found that one parent usually brain washes the mind of the child against the non–custodial parent. India must accede to United Nation’s Convention of International Parental Child Abduction, which is long overdue.

6.      Due consideration should be given to both grandparents to have equal access to their grandchild to shower their love and affection and to spend quality time in their life.

1.      Encourage children to go to separated Father’s / Mother’s home every week end instead of supervised visitation or limited to family court premises or a park etc

2.      Train Family court Judges as what constitutes child welfare and Hon’ble Supreme court should also lay down guidelines to avoid prevailing confusion.

3.      Child support should be properly accounted and not disguised alimony to spouse & the father should be allowed to all rights of a father including participate in sports day, parents teachers meeting, get updates on the progress report,  etc from the school.

With this letter, we hereby request to take concrete steps as per our above demands to ensure that a Child doesn’t get an unwritten Divorce/Separation decree while his/her parents get such a decree.

Thanking you,

Yours faithfully,

Swarup Sarkar                         Wasif Ali                                 Niladri Shekhar Das                Vitesh Agarwal

(Founder Member)                  (Treasurer)                              (Media Campaign)                  (Coordinator)

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